Parental control software is designed to help parents manage and monitor their children’s digital activities, but it comes with several downsides, and tech-savvy kids often find ways to bypass these controls.
There is a false sense of security that comes with using this software. Some parents rely too heavily on these tools, believing they fully protect their children, while kids may still encounter harmful content or find workarounds.
Overly restrictive settings can invade a child’s privacy, leading to resentment and a lack of trust between parents and kids.
Some parental controls unintentionally block access to educational resources or harmless websites, frustrating children who need access for school or personal development
Overuse of control measures without discussions, with your child, on responsible internet use may lead kids to rebel and actively seek ways to circumvent restrictions.
Many parental control filters fail to accurately distinguish between harmful and appropriate content, causing unnecessary blocks or missing problematic material.
And parents of addicted gamers and/or chronic social media scrollers understand that when the insatiable cravings are strong, these children will look for any means to bi-pass the controlling software.
For almost every software a parent places on a system there are several YouTube videos explaining, in detail, how to get around them. Loopholes is a commonly searched word for those looking to break into a controlled system.
A young client of mine and I were discussing the concepts of parental controls and how easy they are to get around. Here’s what he had to say,
“I stumbled into hacking during middle school when I loved to play video games but sometimes I distressed my parents by playing too much. They couldn’t just take my computer away while I needed it for homework, so my father set up a SonicWall for content-filtering. My favorite gaming sites thereby became inaccessible, displaying the taunting message “BLOCKED.” In dire efforts to regain my freedom, I researched countermeasures and discovered tunnel websites that let me play under his radar. This approach didn’t always work, and I later learned to install a VPN (Virtual Private Network.
My father soon upped his router defenses too and restricted internet traffic to a fixed schedule. Once again, he had me scrambling to figure out “what was this sorcery?” Aha! He was preventing my computer’s MAC address from accessing the network! MAC address spoofing was the remedy for this, although short lived. He instead blocked my computer’s IP address, but I found that disconnecting and reconnecting my ethernet to the switch gave it a new IP (Internet Protocol) address via DHCP (Dynamic Host Configuration Protocol).”
Here are some of the other ways that children get around controls.
Factory resetting a device can remove installed parental control apps.
Some kids create secondary email accounts or use incognito/private browsing modes to avoid detection.
If parents use weak passwords, tech-savvy kids can guess or retrieve them to disable controls.
Many sites allow users to bypass content filters by acting as intermediaries.
If restrictions are time-based, some kids change the device’s time zone settings to extend their screen time.
It’s easy to see that parental controls are not always effective, especially when our children have grown up with tech, and can access information and strategies to counter protective software. Instead of relying on parental controls, parental supervision and/or, regulating or removing devices may be necessary. Having children using their devices in a supervised area will be more effective than allowing them to use desktops, laptops, iPads, and/or phones behind closed doors in their bedrooms.
For online safety, some built-in device features and safe browsing settings can be used. Google SafeSearch and YouTube restricted modes are available and can filter out explicit content without requiring third-party apps. And Apple’s Screen Time or Android’s Digital Wellbeing provide insights into device usage without invasive controls.
If you’ve removed computers and consoles, but your child still requires a phone, Bark Phone (USA) or Pinwheel Phone (CAD), monitors social media, video games, and messaging apps and cannot be hacked without parental permission.
If you do decide to use parental software, Qustodio is a non-invasive way to help families manage screen time and teach online balance.
The most practical strategy is to create tech-free zones, like no screens during meals, before bed, or in the morning upon walking. And designate “unplugged” times on weekends or evenings for the entire family.
Encourage alternate activities such as reading, outdoor play, and creative hobbies. Have your child join sports, clubs, and/or social clubs to provide more balance in their life.
Instead of relying solely on parental control software, experts recommend digital literacy education, and setting clear expectations about responsible device use.
Combining guidance with reasonable monitoring is often more effective than strict software enforcement.